One of the most painful experiences as a parent is recognising patterns in your child that mirror the abusive behaviour of someone you worked so hard to leave behind. It can feel like history repeating itself and like you’re being retraumatised in your own home. It’s a scary moment when Read more
Going to Court against your ex can be extremely daunting. You will find lots of posts on social media about how awful the Family Court system is, about how abusers are rarely held accountable in criminal court and how survivors of abuse often feel traumatised by the way they are Read more
My most recent article for https://www.thedivorcemagazine.co.uk/ focusses on the emotions that go with moving out of your family home and the grief that is often felt when you remain in the home after divorce. If you are worried about how you might feel or are struggling with feelings of loss Read more
Kim recently emailed me to share an update on her situation. Kim has given me permission to share with you here so hopefully it will inspire others in similar situations to be brave and keep going: ”I was brave enough to get out in June 2022. I let him stay Read more
As of 29th April 2024 there have been some changes in the way Family Court deals with Child Arrangement applications – these are called the Family Procedure Rules. The purpose of these changes is to encourage divorce professionals and families to try other methods of resolving their disputes about family Read more
I’m writing this post because what happens immediately after an incident of domestic abuse can determine how the next few days go and also how difficult or easy it is to get the ongoing help you need- in terms of help with housing, criminal and civil measures and also help Read more
Financial abuse is one of the most common tactics used within a controlling relationship. If you have no financial independence or access to your own money, it’s harder for you to leave, right? You often don’t even realise that you are being financially abused either. It can be very subtle. Read more
Background Helen contacted me when feeling overwhelmed after years of litigation with her ex-husband. With a demanding job and 2 young children to support, it was a lot to deal with and she was exhausted. Helen was facing court hearings and constant emotional abuse and manipulation by her ex. This Read more
There is a hole in my sidewalk, by Portia Nelson. “I walk down the street. There is a deep hole in the sidewalk. I fall in. I am lost… I am helpless. It isn’t my fault. It takes forever to find a way out. I walk down the same street. Read more
Recognising abuse in any relationship can be difficult because often the tactics are so subtle. As well as the generic types of tactics abusers use (constant criticism, belittling, financial abuse, conflict over the children etc ) there are often tactics used within LGBTQ relationships, which are very specific. Tactics you Read more